Thursday, May 28, 2015

x2 Step 148 – My practice is my gift to God. Journal – Step 147



Today:  Step - 148 My practice is my gift to God. (MP3)

“My practice is my gift to God.” Step - 148
 
YOUR PRACTICE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD, for God wills that you receive Knowledge so that you may give it to the world. Thus, you are honored as the recipient and as the vehicle for Knowledge, God is honored as the source of Knowledge, and all who receive it will be honored as well.  This is your gift now — to undertake the true preparation that you are involved in currently.

THEREFORE, TREAT EACH PRACTICE PERIOD TODAY as a form of giving. Upon the hour, give yourself in each circumstance in which you find yourself. In your two deep meditation practices, give yourself completely. Do not come begging for ideas or information, but come to receive and come to give. As you give yourself, you will receive and in this you will learn the ancient law that to give is to receive. This must be born completely in your experience so that you may fully comprehend its meaning and its application in the world.

YOUR PRACTICE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD. Your practice is your gift to yourself. Come to your practice today to give, for in your giving you will realize the depth of your own resources.

PRACTICE 148: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly practice.


From the journal Step - 147 Review
 
8:30 a.m. Saturday, January 13, 2001 –

Freedom – David, you’re 24, a father – I set you free, because I have no more help to give. No more money – I've got to take care of my own future.

Today, up and on the net – I like the New York Times headlines, and my online global community. It makes me feel connected – within the illusion.

S2K gives me perspective within the illusion. It feels accurate. A double veil?


– monopolar world – my pole is the pole –

4:51 p.m

. At Tysons Corner – here in the retail wilderness completing the long practice review. Completed the 3 x 5 card notes for past two weeks. Sent GCW [Greater Community Way] info via email to Jean Hudon. Need to send it to Bill S….

10:39 p.m. Back from nova – wine and Nachos – someday will give those up too. California is having a Commission on regions. A guy signed up for regions work – address "CA" so I sent him some emails. Too bad I don't have a fully articulated theory. It is still coming through, and I've been indolent.

> Can there be integration without pro-active integrators? Change agents with the vision of cooperation and integration of thoughts, actions, processes – and feedback loops – a communications loop.

Vision is the easy part…

> S2K is moving me now…imperfect as I am. I'm being unburdened further – David – he's now on his own financially – I can help no more. Emily and Lane – what becomes of them? I said we'd take Emily. That is supported by Cindy – and so – we can do something together, though it seems unlikely that Jamie would agree w/o a court taking the kids. Still – that option unburdens me. I lent David $5500 to get a truck with a $300/month payment – not the $600+ he has.

I told mom today. She wanted to read her own spin into it. Cindy as well. I am prepared to accept the outcome – David & Jamie crashing, the children at risk. David could hurt himself/kill himself – or others – so – we could make the news, there could be pain, suffering, trauma and death – public spectacle and humiliation/embarrassment.

What lies ahead… I cannot know – but I will trust knowledge.

Some heavy thoughts and situations in the journal this day. As of 2015, the circumstances have been survived by most of those mentioned. Spirituality helped me get though tough periods, but it does not solve problems. Some problems have no solutions, according to the GCW teachers.

That miracles could be managed; sent to a circumstance with a little shift from those who have to those who don’t, was implied in A Course in Miracles (ACIM) and that was my understanding. In traditional Christian prayer, we are told that God answers all prayer, but sometimes the answer is “no” or “not now.” The AICM teaching that our life in the separation is an illusion may be true, but personally, I don’t have the sense that my mind is great enough to have constructed this illusion. I began to look for something to help me understand life in this “temporary” existence, that is, “illusion management” skills. That is what I found in Greater Community Spirituality.

Life relationships can be quite difficult and made more so by the difficulty of communicating values and truth to others, such as your children. In the middle of such difficulties it is normal to ask, I think, “Why did I choose this life?” and “How did I end up with these people?” and “What did I do wrong?” Is it Karma?

Journal when you can, particularly when in difficult, long term, disconcerting situations. When recording thoughts, be open to contemplation breaks and spontaneous stillness periods. Listen for helpful thoughts and/or images/visions to record them; write or draw, which are seeds for solutions, of the current problem – or others in the future. The value may not be immediately recognized, which is why it is important to review your journals more than for the Steps review periods.

When you go on a trip or for vacation, instead of taking a book or magazine, or reading electronically, take some older journals and “read yourself.”

Let us continue.

NNC


Note: If you’ve some interest due to this or other Steps, you should go to the beginning blog post. From here you will learn about Steps to Knowledge and can begin it on the day that makes sense; then progress as needed. You can use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in order in the archives - one post per Step.

Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well through the Free School of the New Message.

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