x2 Step 261 - I must learn to give with discernment. – Journal – Step 260

Today:  Step 261 - I must learn to give with discernment. (MP3)

Step 261 - I must learn to give with discernment.

IF YOU GIVE WITHOUT PERSONAL AMBITION, you will give according to Knowledge, and your gift will be specific and given in such a way that it will empower you and those who can receive your gift. This is Knowledge guiding you. If you try to give for your own self-aggrandizement, if you try to give for your own self-assurances or if you try to give to alleviate an abiding sense of guilt or inadequacy, you will not give with discernment. Your giving, then, will be ill placed and will produce increasing conflict and discouragement for you.

LIFE DOES NOTHING AIMLESSLY. Everything fulfills a purpose. Therefore, your giving must be done with discernment, and your discernment is something you must learn step by step, day by day. This is Wisdom functioning in the world. With Knowledge you must learn this Wisdom; otherwise, you will not be able to give your true gifts effectively and will misinterpret their results. Knowledge will give you that which must be given truly and will direct you to give truly. If you do not interfere with this or place an extra burden upon your giving, your giving will be totally effective and will acknowledge both the giver and the receiver.

REMEMBER THIS UPON THE HOUR. Exercise discernment. There are people you should not give to in a direct way. There are people you should give to in a direct way. There are situations you should not enter. There are situations you must enter. There are problems you should not involve yourself with. There are problems you should involve yourself with. How can you personally discern where your gifts must be placed? Only Knowledge can discern this, and you can only discern it with Knowledge. Therefore, trust your deepest inclinations today. Do not let compulsions born of guilt or fear guide you or motivate you in your desire to give. Practice this day to learn discernment. Practice this day to align yourself with Knowledge.

IN YOUR LONGER PRACTICE PERIODS engage yourself once again with attempting to comprehend today’s lesson. Do not be happy with false assumptions. Consider all thoughts and feelings in favor of or against today’s idea. Begin to observe your own ambitions. Begin to observe how they are born of your fears. Begin to discern how simple it is to follow Knowledge. With simplicity comes power. You must learn discernment. Learning this will take time. In this, you learn to utilize all experiences for good, for no experience should be condemned. It should always be used for learning and preparation. In this way, you will not justify error, but use it for your own development and for the advancement of the world.

PRACTICE 261: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly practice.

From the journal:  Step 260 - I am a friend of the world today.

May 6, 2001

9:55 a.m. On waking – "Fairfax" – meaning go with Cindy – Some traditions say earth is a school – CWG – said not – S2K says it's a learning environment where we’re all teacher/students.

Where the Creator may be all knowing – its creation is not – and the progeny of the Creator need to learn. One lesson is to take form and be in form and survive.

3:36 p.m. Practice #1 – Unitarian U. – church – SV. I met many friends – Doug A …, Charles B …, Charlie S …, Bill M …, Mary Ann B… – Time for Practice #1 – "I am a friend of the world today". /Jack Costanza – Mr. Bongo – American roots "Back from Havana"

8:13 p.m. At the office – prep for DSB tomorrow. We could be doing more – it is a good group.

The day with Cindy was typical. There is no communication – everything is strained.

I do not feel that we can begin sharing now – after I've learned to say nothing for ten years.

I'm still very angry about the PDC thing and her continuous attacks. ACIM may say attack is a cry for help – I can't help her.

This is not a relationship where we can do anything together. I can't see that changing.

I don't know how to get out of it. I don't need a relationship to go to – I just need stability. It has a high price.

9:47 p.m. My anger is getting worse. What is the true communication? I'm living with a stranger who irritates me. Being patient, I've tolerated bad relationships. Why? Fear of loss? Dishonesty? Shame? All of these are true.

I think the situation is dead-end. I want it to end peaceably and w/o personal loss. …

I think I'm trapped. I want to be free. I know S2K will get me there.

Practice #2. "I am a friend of the world today".

10:18 p.m. Stopped early. I think this marriage was a mistake. I want it to be over. I know there will be pain – more pain than waiting for time’s resolution. Once again – patience is the answer.

In the meditation there was resolution with the Valley Tribal Council. I feel good about the Unitarian Church – very intellectual… which may be a limitation – still they are working as a regional community.

Relationships get great scrutiny in Steps and the other New Message publications. Why did we come here? Let us continue.

NNC

 

Note: If you’ve some interest due to this or other Steps, you should go to the beginning blog post. From here you will learn about Steps to Knowledge and can begin it on the day that makes sense; then progress as needed. You can use the posts on this blog as a companion if it helps. They will remain in order in the archives - one post per Step.

Often it takes 18 months to get through the Steps once. For this blog, the pace is one-a-day, but it really makes no difference how fast you do it, only that you begin, persist and repeat. Posts here provide a trail that may let you have a virtual companion when and if you want one. One may have to study alone, as I did in the beginning. There are other Steps students blogging their experience and you might find a person more like you as a companion, or use a number of such Steps journeys. There are options as well through the Free School of the New Message.